Something about drinking cold water really hits the clitoris of the soul....

mistakes are so normal and human and inevitable and necessary and real. if i make one however please put me to death

its true that romance amd friendship will not solve everything but. objectively speaking its very hard to get sad when you can say 'lets go get cake tomorrow okay' and someone will go get cake with you. like there is some good at least. you know

the way these strikes get framed is always so funny to me

"the strike could stretch on until the end of summer" or the execs could pay their workers

"there won't be ANY new shows because of this strike" or the execs could pay their workers

"no more content for us because the mean old writers and actors are-" OR THE EXECS COULD PAY THEIR WORKERS

everyones got that homie who, within the depths of the dungeon, found a cruel facsimile of that which he desired most, and was corrupted absolutely

you'd look a lot sexier on the sacrificial slab but whatever

as my own direct immediate list of game grievances i hate that stardew valley expects you to side against a wheelchair user who is upset that he was moved without his consent. i hate that the mass effect trilogy gives you visible scarring as a direct result of choosing mean dialogue and heals it if you're nice. i hate that the vampire the masquerade ttrpg has a monstrous player class that can appear as horrible vampiric monsters or as visibly disabled people and both of these appearances are mechanically the same. i hate that dark souls games have a difficulty level implemented in a way that cannot be adjusted for disability. i hate that i can play as a mermaid or a werewolf or a horse in the sims games but can't use a wheelchair. i hate that the ace attorney games have so much flashing and not all of the games can disable it. i hate that disability is constantly something that happens to teach a lesson, i hate that disability is something that happens as a punishment, i hate that disability is either compensated perfectly with no drawbacks or something that is endlessly sought to be cured. i hate that no character customization will ever include the mobility aids i use, that the player avatars that represent me will never look like me. i am so goddamn annoyed and so goddamn tired.

rabbits know and resent their place on the food chain

mice and rats also know they're prey animals, they just have such joy of living that it cancels out. guinea pigs have no concept of death but understand contextless fear. hamsters however do know the food chain, but they also know that attachment to the earth is the root of suffering and they wisely deny the faults of the ego

Gotta get married so I can avoid situations with a “oh sorry I can’t, my wife needs me home asap” and then go home to my beautiful wife

rosencrantz is dead guildenstern is dead and me i feel also not so good

OTC BIRTH CONTROL APPROVED BY THE FDA